Derp Tee – For Fellow Magnificent Schmucks

Finally, a shirt that matches your life choices! This “Derp” tee is perfect for those moments when you’ve said something spectacularly dumb, walked into a glass door, or tried to push a door that clearly says “pull” again. Some of us have been there – now you can advertise it.

This cotton tee is designed for comfort during your daily mishaps and mental lapses. Whether you’re the person who forgets their own phone number, puts salt in your coffee, or asks “what?” three times before giving up, this shirt gets you.

Ideal for awkward social situations, brain fog days, or when you want to let people know upfront that you’re probably not the sharpest tool in the shed – and you’re oddly proud of it.Crafted for women who prefer real-world style over virtual snake oil, this softstyle tee won’t crash overnight, rug-pull your closet, or require a 37-step wallet recovery phrase. It’s fashion for those who skipped the FOMO and kept their dignity (and dollars).

Perfect for brunch, errands, or silently roasting that guy at the party who keeps calling himself a “crypto futurist” while trying to expense his gas fees. Because while he’s explaining decentralized ownership to a houseplant, you’ll be out here… looking good in cotton.

Product Features

• Ribbed knit collar that holds its shape—unlike your buddy’s JPEG investments

• Shoulder tape for structure, not to be confused with the imaginary kind

• Double-needle stitching that, like your common sense, is surprisingly rare these days

• Side seams for actual stability (take notes, Ethereum bros)

• 100% ringspun cotton: soft, breathable, and never hosted on OpenSea

Care Instructions

• Machine wash: cold, like the dead eyes of NFT shillers

• Bleach: non-chlorine only—this shirt doesn’t need to be whitewashed like your losses

• Tumble dry: medium, unlike your risk tolerance

• Do not iron—it’s already hot enough from truth bombs

• Do not dry clean—it doesn’t need laundering like your favorite Discord group